My name is Gabriel.
I would like you to smile.
I would like you to think.
I would like you to question.
I would like you to wake up.



Trivial Brain Damage

A false disagreement I keep with my cortex, 
when mirrors disengage from content, 
instead proposing a plan to self destruct.
Left and right brain duel over stretch marks.
The constant time keeping the train of thought, 
delivers a series of newsletters telling, 
all about the newest shortcomings on display.

Guessing about the wedges between my fingers,
they absorb like moss in front of a crowd, 
to flourish a life that erodes and siphons another’s.
A symbiosis that grows if left unchecked by,
the audience, the grand jury of peers, 
fascinated by every facet of movement, 
or so it is thought, when in fact each believes, 
the same unspoken grievance of judgement.
Invoked isolation is a testament to shallow doubts.

Not Feeling Up To It

Happiness would be appreciated sometime soon.
Not that I could find among anything
I never found it among anyone.
Best bet to find it within me I suppose.

From myself and my core I wish to be more.
When surrounded by people, I don’t feel me,
I feel alone. Even when alone, I can be happy.
I am me in crowds, but don’t want to be me.

In Search of Fragments of Time When It Had Stopped.


The soporific stretch of one-hundred miles, with the same Midwestern fields blurring on the windows, always struck a familiar chord with me. Whenever I drove passed Lisa’s Pie Shop, I considered stopping by out of interest in roadside desserts, but home was a straight shot away and I kept on.

Every visit to-and-from the heart of the state evoked memories of law-bending naivety and diary-stuffing dilemmas. My friends and I channeled between lovesickness and transgression while polluting our lungs with cheap cigarettes.
In the classroom, we were upright learners.
After the bell rang, we were sovereigns of the hallway.
During pep rallies, we chewed bubble gum into pink balls and tossed them onto the heads of the cheerleaders sitting several bleachers below us. At a distance, the teeth-imprinted wads appeared like stuck pigs in slick mud-water.
During lunch, I skipped the overly-crowded cafeteria to meet up with the woman I became crazed for after making out in a bathtub and picking at her mind at the biggest house party this insipid county has ever seen.

We patched stories with healthy carelessness before being released into the jungle of responsibility. We were coming-to-terms with adulthood, equally terrified and seemingly prepared, but nonetheless, together.

Patricia Meyer Spacks wrote, “if conflict is the essence of fiction, adolescence provides rich material.” To me, any form of story-telling is eagerly inviting to this truth. It is powerfully bittersweet and unavoidably shifting. We are the living examples of consistent movement, which narrows down to an alteration of self.
From faded band-tee’s to ironed long-sleeves. From playfully dodging situations that result in mugshots to carefully budgeting for a mortgage.

As the wheels continued to bump over cracks on the pavement, I was consumed by dreamy contemplation, remembering all that was simple.



i’m sick if always having to prove that i am ACTUALLY interested in the stuff i like, just because someone doesn’t understand it that doesn’t mean i’m stupid and can’t tell apart interesting and boring things… next time someone questions that i can be not only interested but also good in opposing disciplines i’ll mention leonardo da vinci and just say they’re narrow-minded instead of making efforts to explain how someone with a love for journalism and poetry can go into computer science and why everything is connected… ugh

don’t ever give up an interest just because people say it doesn’t ‘suit you’ or they don’t understand what you like about it and make you question yourself

there is no time for these things, just let them get frustrated while you write your guitar songs about nuclear physics and learn japanese while making expressionist art, listening to post punk and getting into the inner workings of your state’s politics before you recite shakespeare and write a fantasy novel in the chemistry lab… and kick ass at ALL of these things

it doesn’t matter

this has destroyed almost all my motivation to work on anything because i don’t have a distinct subject that is ‘mine’ but really it is what you make it

the world is open and consistency is just a construct to keep us from exploring it


I’ve noticed that when something happens to me that shouldn’t have I just kind of shrug it off and make myself believe that I’m overreacting, that it wasn’t actually what I think it was. I always think that worse things have happened to people so I shouldn’t feel badly about any of the stuff that has happened to me. But that’s wrong and I need to start making myself believe that what has happened is not okay and that I do deserve to be treated better. I went through these things and it has effected me and that right there is enough to know that it is important. Those moments set the tone for the rest of my interactions with the opposite sex and all of those as a whole, over the past 7 years, have made me see my worth as less than it is. Do you ever just get so used to a certain way for so long that you forget that’s not how it’s supposed to be at all? 


First synthetic biological leaf could allow humans to colonize space
In order for humans to live in outer space, they must have a steady supply of oxygen they can depend on. Now, instead of relying on plants that may not survive, they can use an artificial biological leaf designed by a London graduate student.
Julian Melchiorri, a graduate student in innovation design engineering at the UK’s Royal College of Art, created the synthetic leaf, which he called the ‘Silk Leaf Project’. The design was for an RCA course offered in collaboration with Tufts University’s silk lab in Massachusetts.
Like the leaf from a real plant, the synthetic leaf uses photosynthesis to produce oxygen, by absorbing light, water and carbon dioxide. “The artificial leaves feature chloroplasts extracted from actual plant cells that are suspended in a material made from silk protein. So when given access to light and water they still produce oxygen, but they’re better suited to surviving off our planet,”Gizmodo reported.

Deep Questions

1: Close your eyes and think of five things that make you smile when you think about them. What are they?
2: If your house was on fire and you had sixty seconds to leave, what would you take with you?
3: When you're alone in the middle of the night and you can't quite get to sleep, what do you think about? "Going to sleep" doesn't count.
4: What is love to you?
5: What is the opposite of love?
6: Is it possible to love someone if you don't love yourself?
7: Do you believe mutual attraction based on mutual hatred is possible?
8: Is it better to have something amazing and lose it or to never have had it to begin with?
9: Do you focus more on the past, the present, or the future?
10: Do you judge people for what they wear or how they express themselves?
11: Do you believe in individuals over generalisations?
12: When you're very scared or worried, what do you think about or do to help you feel better?
13: How do you feel about what happens after death?
14: Would you rather live a hedonistic life full of good things that make you feel good even if they're bad for you, or a healthy life centered around treating your body like a sacred temple and watching your health as closely as possible? Or do you not care either way?
15: Do you think you can tell a lot about a person from the way they express themselves or answer questions like these?
16: Do you have any special or magical memories you'll always have with you?
17: How would you define yourself, without saying your name or giving a physical description of yourself or your obvious personality?
18: When do you feel truly at peace?
19: Do you like having your worldview or opinions challenged or questioned?
20: Do you believe happiness can exist without sadness?
21: Is there a reason for existence?
22: Do you think the world existed before you did?
23: Do you believe people need breaks from each other, even if they're deeply in love?
24: What do you find most beautiful in people?
25: Do you take questions like these literally or pick up on what they really mean?
i wanna do these ! someone ask me stuff : D

This is the tumblr group hug. Pass it on.


Looove yooou guys



A wave viewed from underwater